Sunday, February 23, 2020

Handyman





Handyman: Handyman

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Don’t Fear the Hammer
As you wake up in the morning, you feel a drop on your face: the ceiling’s leaking. You
stumble down the stairs for your morning paper, glance at a typically morbid headline,
and turn back inside, only to find that no, the old wooden front door won’t shut. As you
sit at the kitchen table reading your daily dose of bad news, you glance out the back
window to see your five-year-old, who’s been playing on the back deck, suddenly
disappear. You open the back door (the lock mechanism sticking hard) only to find a
broken section of rotted deck, your child lost somewhere in the unknown realm of giant
spiders below.
You walk back inside, shaking your head. “Well, it will be an adventure for him–a good
learning experience,” you think. “Besides, I haven’t had my coffee yet.” But as you sit
down in the living room, you’re distracted by a few dozen holes in the walls left by years
of nails and screws. Your reading is further disturbed by the sound of water dripping
from your leaky kitchen faucet. Ploop…ploop…ploop–each one is louder than the last.
So you run to your upstairs “study” for shelter, only to remember, as you sit at your
desk, that the windows in this room haven’t opened for months, making it more like a
cloistered oven than a den.




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